Bang! Bang!

Well, I thought I was doing that other thing, but now I'm doing this! There's a women-only shooting seminar this Sunday out in Liberty Hill and the cost is only $50 + ammo. Shooting guns is the most fun I've ever had wearing earmuffs. You should come out, too, ladies!!

Who Knows?

I have no idea who this guy is, but...

There's a seminar in Austin at Castle Hill Fitness this Friday, July 8 on recovering from trauma. He is a Somatic Experiencing practitioner, similar to Jules Shore. You can read my interview with Jules here, to learn more about the effects of trauma on the body & mind.

The seminar is from 6:30-7:30, and it's FREE. To get more information, click on the event's Facebook page.

I have no idea what to expect but I'll probably check it out, as this sort of thing holds enless fascination for me. If you're there, too, come shake my paw!

Ladies of Legend

Today's Ladies-only class was awesome. I totally dropped the ball and forgot to advertise the upcoming class, plus it was a holiday weekend, and I still had a group of ladies in cute clothes ready to whoop some butt.

After some warmup drills we worked on the concept of bursting in toward a pull. I didn't teach arm drags or hair pulls, just bursting in, period. Then we played monkey-in-the-middle, where the defender is dragged around by her hair, clothes, arms, whatever we could grab while still holding a pad for her to attack. She also had to put up with being body-slammed with the pads, then turning to attack that pad.

From there we went on to practice a scenario that a fellow student described to me of what happened when she was attacked by her ex. He (once again) assaulted her and attempted to murder her - but she fought him off! We all defended exactly that attack, using that defense, against each person in the class. So, student who told me your story (I'll tell you who you are privately), you just helped a lot of people survive that type of attack thanks to your courage under attack and your willingness to share!

Next we worked the concept of running away vs. running to. The difference is largely mental (like so much else we do) and you can actually see the switch in the student when she makes the change. Very exciting to watch that happen, we'll do the drill again in the morning level 1/2 classes next week so the guys get a crack at it, too.

The last thing we did was create a plan of what we will do in case of attack. Now obviously, you can't plan for every scenario - and it's usually the last thing one expects that actually happens. But by creating a basic plan and talking it out with someone, and even practicing it, your chances of success (meaning survival) increase tremendously.

Here are some questions to ask yourself when creating your first plan:

Who do you spend the most time with? It may be your co-workers. Create the plan based on a scenario in which you are with that person or persons. Are you at the location of your job? Are you out to lunch together? We are not trying to make a prediction here, just practicing thinking of these things objectively and logically.

If you are in the office, where is the most logical place for a person to attack you? Would they just be entering from the lobby? At your desk? In the parking lot?

This person you are frequently with...do they know how to fight? Will they be able to talk to the person or distract him (or her) while you get help or initiate defenses? Can they call the cops for you?

What is the fastest exit you both can get to? What if they chase you through the exit? What is the fastest safe place you can reach?

Bring these questions up to the person you have in mind. They may roll their eyes at you, accuse you of being a scaredy-cat, etc. Tell them your teacher told you to have this conversation and keep at them.

A plan does not consist of, "yeah, I'll probably fight and scream, you should just take off".

A plan looks more like "I'll distract him while you run. You always have your phone on you, so dial 911-SEND. You will keep running. Do not look back to see if I'm okay, do not come back for any reason. I will fight the second he is distracted and you start running. If I survive I will go straight to the Starbucks next door. Tell the 911 dispatcher the ambulance may find me there instead of in the office. If I can't escape the office I'll barricade myself in Bob's office. His desk is near the door, I can use it the block the door." (Question: Can you move Bob's desk? You'd better find out.)

Having a plan is empowering and can keep you alive. Having a pre-set place to run TO makes you run faster (seriously), and makes it possible for help to reach you sooner.

Lastly, sometimes the people we spend time with (even those who love us) don't really take our efforts in Krav Maga seriously. They might believe we are too small, too nice, too whatever. Maybe they think violence doesn't really happen to nice people. We are cautioned to "just give him your purse" (as if that would stop a rapist) or we are otherwise counseled that we will get hurt if we fight.

Of course, we will get hurt if we fight. We might even die.

We will also get hurt and maybe even die if we do NOT fight - if the attacker wants to hurt us. He may even take pleasure in that.

In certain situations, compliance with an attacker might ensure your survival. In others it might get you killed. You must listen to your gut during the violent encounter itself.

But know this: even a little bee can sting. Even a small person can defend himself or herself against an attacker. You are worth defending, and you can do it.

Need an example? Check out this awesome entry on Badass of the Week. (Warning: profanity!)

Next time someone tells you that you are too small to defend yourself, remember Badass of the Week's little Rukhsana Kauser and the terrorist who beat her family so he could rape her. If she could defend herself and her family, you can do it. See you next month, ladies!

I Glove U

New students are commonly confused about which hand protection is best for them. I realized last week when when two different students showed up wearing weightlifting gloves that it might be time to tackle the glove issue. Different gloves (or wraps) have different functions, read below to see which might be right for you. Note: When you start training your friends might try to help you out by giving you a pair of gloves they aren’t using. If you’re unsure of whether you should use them in class, look at the placement of the padding on the glove. In Krav Maga class you will want protection for your knuckles (from impact) and for your wrist (from buckling upon impact). Weightlifting gloves have pads on the palm and inner fingers which will not help you when punching. Batting gloves have no padding and aren’t helpful in class either, though I do use them at the Box when doing pull ups.

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Wraps are traditionally worn under boxing gloves to further protect the knuckles and wrist. Wraps alone offer minimal protection for the knuckles, but they’re certainly better than nothing. They offer excellent protection for the wrist, and have the added benefit of being completely adjustable, both in placement and in snugness. They also leave the fingers completely free to grab your opponent or your water bottle. Plus, let’s face it, wraps look pretty cool.

Wrist wraps are just what they claim to be, consisting of a stretchy fabric that supports the wrist, with velcro closure and a loop for the thumb to stabilize the wrap. These are a good choice if you need a little extra protection for the wrist and nothing more. They are a good stabilizer to try when you’re almost-but-not-quite healed from a wrist injury.

Fingerless gloves, also known as grappling or MMA gloves, offer more knuckle protection than wraps while also supporting the wrist. They are good for striking focus mitts or other hand held pads, but don’t offer enough shock absorption for going all out on the heavy bags. Compared to wraps, they offer less wiggle room for your fingers but are much quicker to apply to and remove from the hand.

Classic boxing gloves offer the highest level of protection for the hands. They’re my favorite choice for punching anything. When you’re going for timed rounds, switching pads with your partner every other round, they’re a fast option for making the switch, as you don’t have to drive 10 fingers into their own little finger hole, as with MMA gloves. If you’re just starting your training and working to get into shape, you might start with 12 ounce gloves and work your way up to traditional 16 ounce gloves. Either way it’s quickly going to feel as if you’re holding a brick in each hand. With boxing gloves, the higher the weight, the thicker the padding.

I eventually came to own all the types of hand protection listed, and you may wish to do the same. However, if you’re just beginning, consider which one will best suit your needs and start with that. If you need anything else it will become apparent during your training. Don’t hesitate to ask your instructors which equipment they prefer. We love to talk about this stuff & will yak your ear off about it.

Protect Ya Back

Sometimes a little change can make you or break you.

We go hard in Krav and ouchies like big bruises and sore muscles are just the cost of doing business if you want to train. As one of my early trainers told me when I was whining about being sore:

***Everybody has aches and pains. You can have the aches and pains of an athlete or the aches and pains of an overweight couch potato. Pick one.***

However, there's a difference between an ouchie and an injury. An injury to the shoulder or knee (I'm icing my knee as I write this) can significantly inhibit your training. A back injury can take you out of the game permanently.

So it's extremely important not only to train smart and know when to attack and when to ease off, but also to protect your spine by strengthening your core. It may not be fun to do core exercises, but you only get one spine. You're never going to get another one.

Does it sound like I'm lecturing you? Yeah, I kinda am.

Here's a video of some core exercises suggested by Stuart McGill, world renowned Professor of Spine Biomechanics at the University of Waterloo in Canada. McGill is the guy professional sports teams, governments, and rich dudes fly from all over the world to be treated by.

You will find that he dislikes crunches, and we do loads of those, don't we? So does every other gym I've ever stepped foot in, so take his advice and make it work for you. (Spoiler alert - here's your little change.) When you do sit ups or crunches, raise up from the chest & maintain a neutral spine and neck. Imagine there's a string attached to the ceiling and to your sternum and it's drawing your sternum straight up. It's hard, which is awesome, and saves your back.

click here for the video

No Spoon Feeding

I was talking to my friend Heather the other day, about teaching and how to do it right. Heather is a behavioral specialist, specializing in Special Education, for a few Central Texas school districts. Did you like how I worked "special" 3 times into one sentence? I do. I worked with her at Austin ISD for several years and after watching her consistently be the smartest and most competent person on the planet, I pretty much take anything she says as gospel.

She taught me that one of the reason students come out of school with no problem-solving skills is that all the necessary pieces of information to solve a problem are handed to them. Consequently, they don't know how to puzzle out for themselves what they really need and don't need to reach a desired conclusion.

So I thought about how that might apply to teaching Krav Maga. We do generally (not always) say "here's how you handle this particular problem. Practice this technique." Which is great - up to a point.

So in today's Women-Only class I decided to make them figure it out for themselves. We sat down & I asked, "What if you know you're in some danger but the fight isn't on? What can you do to head things off before they even begin? And what are the probable consequences of those actions?" They sat and waited for the answer - but nope!. They were giving the answers today. Here are the excellent answers they gave:

*walk/drive to a crowded area (yes, we want witnesses!)

*ask for help from someone who works there (assuming that applies)

*pull out your cell phone (I love this, as you can take a picture of them - an act which has solved some crimes - or you can show you are prepared to take action without escalating the situation.)

*maintain strong eye contact

*run

*use social engagement, or try to talk your way out of it

*maintain distance

*call 911

*loudly order them to leave you alone (if they refuse, you just learned a lot about their intentions)

*make a scene (if in public)

*yell or scream

These last 3 are actually some of the most difficult for many people to perform. The social pressures to NOT yell, make a scene, etc. in a public place are very, very strong. Each of these actions can have different consequences. When you consider which of these options you are most likely to choose, you must consider several things:

*Are you accustomed to drawing boundaries in your normal life? That will influence how strongly you are able to tell them to leave you alone. That will influence their reaction.

*If you yell or make a scene be prepared for people to back away from you. Consider saying things like, "I don't know you, stop touching me, I don't know you, you're scaring me, etc." You will have witnesses that the other person was the aggressor. That may not translate into help in the moment, but if they don't believe its a family or couple's squabble your chances of getting help improve.

*If you prefer to run, are you fast? Will you be hindered by a child, an elderly person, even your shoes? What if they catch you? I'm not saying you shouldn't run (I have run away from a dangerous situation!), just that you need to put some real thought into your choice.

Later we moved to the hallway leading the the garage and worked on drawing boundaries, then palm heels, elbows, and knees. Then defending our friend against another attacker, which was nice.

The last exercise was walking the gauntlet. Each pair of partners had to quickly discuss what they were best at, of the techniques we had worked on in class (drawing boundaries verbally, combatives, running to a pre-determined safety zone). They also had to decide how they would attack the pair who were walking the gauntlet. Would they just taunt them? Would both attack one person of the pair? Two on two? The goal was to make a decision in the moment how you were being attacked about how to defend and escape. Do you defend as a team? Does one defend and one go for help?

Frankly, I also had a secret goal. By having the students decide how to attack different people they are forced to look at the defenders perceived weaknesses. I want them to look at someone and decide how to attack them without getting hurt themselves. I want them to think like predators, just for that moment. If they understand how to be a predator, I hope they understand better how to defend themselves from one.

A final note: During the drill one woman panicked and ran, leaving her partner to defend herself alone. She felt terrible about abandoning her partner, and now I wish I hadn't teased her about it. Of course I didn't realize at the time she was upset. But here's the thing: she got away. She's a survivor. I like survivors. She'd said earlier she thought she'd be likely to run when faced with danger, and she did. Her partner successfully fought her way through, so it was fine. I doubt that young woman would have fled on her own if she'd been with a loved one, but she was with a stranger, so she split. Works for me.

Please know that your first job is to survive. Please know that violence in real life is nothing like it is in the movies. If you panic, your body is going to take over and do what it needs to do to survive. That's its job.

Thanks to Kelli for her general awesomeness in class today, and to everyone who came!

Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Woof?

There is a technique called woofing that involves extreme domination of another individual, either verbally or physically or both. I first learned it from Rory Miller when he came to Austin to teach a seminar.

A common example of woofing is to completely immobilize the person & whisper something in their ear like, “The rest of the class thinks this is just an exercise, but I’m about to make you bleed. There’s nothing you can do to stop me, and no one will help you, they’ll just stand there and watch because they don’t know it’s real...”

The goal might be one of a few things. It might be to incite someone to fight at a higher than normal level of intensity because their adrenaline level skyrockets. Or maybe it’s to see how the person will react. Will they struggle, freeze, cry, give up?

It’s a dangerous game, because to work it must be very convincing and frightening - but it’s also the kind of behavior that can destroy relationships.

Twice this month I’ve been called upon to woof students as the first step of a long drill in which we were trying to get untrained female students to overcome their social conditioning and “unleash the beast”. Both were large groups of women I mostly had never met before.

The first time I was too soft on them and was just being generally annoying, like an older sister teasing her younger siblings. I was told to stop being so nice and do it right. To be effective I had to act like a real predator, saying things like, “I’ve been watching you for weeks, and now that I’ve got you tied up I’m going to fuck you in the ass so hard...” So I said that to the next student up, and it worked, but she never looked me in the face again for the rest of the day, which rattled me.

The next time we did the drill was a couple of weeks later, and I took a different approach. I knew a couple of students were from SafePlace, a battered women’s shelter, but I didn’t know who they were. I wasn’t willing to take a chance on re-traumatizing someone who has actually been assaulted, but I had to get their adrenaline levels up fast or we were just wasting their time. So I grabbed each one by the face, like palming a basketball, shoving her back & pinning her hard against the wall by her face & head. With the other hand I pulled out her ponytail or braid & messed her hair up while saying cruel things.

If they were carrying a few extra pounds I called them a fat-ass.

If they were petite I told them they were weak and pathetic.

If I knew they had children I told them the kid was ugly and stupid and would always make bad grades and be a loser.

I told pretty much everyone they sucked.

It was fascinating to watch their behavior. Some tried to immediately fight, others started breathing heavily, but did not try to fight (they were instructed not to fight me). Others endured calmly, calculating, waiting, plotting ...

After about 10 or 15 seconds I’d release them, yelling “GO!!” and giving them a shove toward their first target.

It was also fascinating, to me, to observe my own feelings about what I was doing. Saying cruel things to people was stressing me out so much my stomach was in knots for hours afterward. But physically dominating them was actually kind of fun. Maybe there’s hope for me in sparring, after all.

Some women chose not to participate, and that’s fine, too. I like that they drew a boundary and stuck with it.

The last two women to go through the drill were friends of mine, which changed things considerably for me. It’s one thing to jack up the adrenaline levels of a stranger when I know it will help her in the end. It’s a whole other ballgame to poke at people you personally care about. But it’s also unfair to them to give them a half-assed version of the drill. So, I told one of them I was having an affair with her husband & told the other her son was stupid & I never liked him. When I released that one, she yelled, “Get the fuck out of my way!!”

Incidentally, it’s hard to woof the woofer, so when it was my turn to go, the first time we did the drill, my instructor, Kelly Campbell, was my woofer. I just shook my head & grinned, so she let me go then suddenly attacked me from behind. She is STRONG! I wasn’t grinning then! I struggled, unwilling to strike her. I wormed and wiggled as hard as I could until she let me go so I could complete the drill. Yes, my adrenaline level was UP!

I want to thank everyone who participated in the ladies seminars in April, especially Kelly and Linda Lyra. Woofing is hard to do (the talking part is, anyway) and hard to endure, but it serves a very important function. I hope the females reading this will come to my monthly ladies-only class at Fit and Fearless in Austin. Held the first Saturday of every month at 11:30, it’s free to any female, so come train and I will only say nice things to you.