I didn't think I was full of shit when I made my last post.
When I said didn't have much feeling one way or the other about the more extreme crimes committed by some of the inmates housed in the facility in which I work, I believed it.
Then the very next night something changed my mind. A particular inmate was convicted of doing something violent and horrible to a person who was defenseless. I won't say what he did, because I really don't know what I'm allowed to say outside of work. This guy was being moved to someplace he didn't want to go and told a lie to postpone it. First he said it to another officer, then later to me. I told him he was going anyway and he just turned around and sat down, emotionless.
When he spoke to me I had the sensation of cockroaches crawling on my skin.
I told another, more experienced officer how I'd reacted and she told me, "That's your instinct warning you. Listen to it."
She made me think of Gavin de Becker's "Gift of Fear". The people I used to refer to in Krav Maga class as "types" of attackers are real people now with faces and names and voices.