A couple of years ago a cop friend of mine told me something that's been clanging around in my head ever since. She said, "The police are not responsible for your safety. YOU are responsible for your safety. The police are just there to clean up the mess."
That made a huge impression on me and has seriously influenced my philosophy when I teach. Since most of us don't walk around with a cop at our sides, we need to be proactive about our own safety.
Sometimes people we live with are the ones that pose a danger to us, and that can leave us feeling totally vulnerable and alone. Yesterday I posted an interview I did with Lisa Lucas, formerly of the Domestic Violence Unit at the Travis County Sheriff's Department (she is now a patrol deputy).
There's a lot of good information in there about what to do if you find yourself in danger at the hands of a loved one. Even if you are not in that situation and don't expect to be (of course, who does expect to be?) it's still worth a listen. The information you learn may help change the life of someone you know.
Check it out here, and thanks to Officer Lucas for taking the time to help us out.
Parker,
ReplyDeleteGreat interview! I listened to all of it and your friend Deputy Lucas had a LOT of good information. If I had anything to add, my 2 cents being worth exactly that, 2 cents, it would be this. Once you've made the choice to leave, LEAVE! Don't look back. Don't play mind games with yourself ( I know you may have had your mind warped after years of being told you're nothing or being beaten into submission and thinking now you are worth nothing) but only YOU can change that cycle of abuse. Make a plan, horde money where they won't find it, keep a packed bag with all your basic necessities and toiletries for a week or so at a friend's house, or store it someplace he won't look. Buy a pre-paid cell phone (one he doesn't know about and hasn't been activated yet)and leave it in that bag. But once you have made the bravest decision of your life to go, trust yourself! GO! Reach out, most women live to help each other in our hour of most need, its what makes women's friendships last for a lifetime. Has he cut you off from all your friends and forced you into seclusion leaving you no one to whom you can run? Run to a church, run to a community center, run to the nearest police substation and say you need to go to the women's shelter. Parker, you and I both work with these women, we see the strength within them and know what they can do once they have made up their minds. I've seen firemen and cops running into burning buildings and cars on fire to pull people out, but these women who take that first step of freedom are just as brave in my book. They've reclaimed their lives, they've decided to stand and they have yet to face the unknown that lies ahead of them and damnit that takes guts!
Like I said, only my two cents. Keep up the good work and inspiring people!
TJ
Wow, awesome post, thanks TJ.
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