Warning: Long Post!

Last night started with a one-one-one with Big Daddy J. He had me do headlock on the ground with Spike as my attacker. Better every time, but still not perfect. Then I "taught" him 360 defenses, which were, meh, okay, but I need to study them & do them again, plus inside defenses as well. Plus work on voice more - much more.

2nd hour was level 2/3 with Relentless. Oh, I was mad at myself!! The first half of the class I gassed out on everything! Nobody's fault but my own - I've almost completely stopped working out outside of krav. I used to be very dedicated to lifting weights & running hill sprints, but that just kind of faded away as I increasingly became "too busy to go to the gym". Ha. Its affecting my krav performance, so vacation is over. You know in Crossfit, I'm happy to work hard (in spite of my protests), but I don't care how I do in relation to everyone else. I don't care about coming in last, I don't care where my name falls on the board - if it even makes it up there at all. That issue just does not exist for me. I want to do the exercises properly and complete the workout, but that's it.

But if I do anything poorly in krav it eats at me without mercy until I correct it. I don't want to be last, I want to be first. I don't want to just get the job done, I want to kick its ass. I know I did fine in the 2nd half of Relentless's class, but in the first half I was struggling just to keep up. This morning the first thought that popped into my head when I opened my eyes, before the images of my dreams had even completely faded away, was to create a plan to address that poor performance and demolish that weakness immediately. Krav is a cruel master, but I've become its willing slave.

3rd hour was Mudslide's MMA class. I started watching this class to learn a few things from the Gorgeous Bastard's performance in there. He's always telling me in private lessons to move more, move around, tuck your chin, blah blah blah. He never shuts up. I knew they'd be sparring in Mudslide's class so I stuck around to see if GB put his money where is mouth is, and I have to say he damn sure did. I was impressed. So watched a few more times & started to get the itch to join in but its such a testosterone fest in there, I didn't want to be an interloper. Some of those guys are so advanced, I didn't want them to be held back by working with someone as inexperienced as me, but Mudslide told me he has a plan to prevent that, so in I went. It was fun! I worked with Miss M, who terrifies me, & Miss V, who was having a first class. Miss V has a great attitude & isn't afraid to work hard, so she was fun. We worked sidemount, mount, & keylocks. I also got to roll with the Professor, who is the most generous teacher ever. He could submit me (and everyone else) with his hands tied while drunk and on Xanax and reciting Shakespeare's sonnets. But he never does that. He just rolls. I can do the techniques well when we're practicing them, but in rolling I can't seem to pull them off. I think next time I'll concentrate on a certain technique & keep trying to get that from different angles instead of letting my head swim with all the different options.